Daily Funny Stuff

Aussie Computer Terminology

Laugh Master — Thu, 17 Mar 2011 10:04:32 +0000

Rural Australian Computer Terminology. A little bit of Aussie kulcha for y’all. G’day!

LOG ON: Adding wood to make the barbie hotter. LOG OFF: Not adding any more wood to the barbie. MONITOR: Keeping an eye on the barbie. DOWNLOAD: Getting the firewood off the Ute. HARD DRIVE: Making the trip back home without any cold tinnies. KEYBOARD: Where you hang the Ute keys. WINDOW: What you shut when the weather's cold. SCREEN: What you shut in the mozzie season. BYTE: What mozzies do. MEGABYTE: What Townsville mozzies do. CHIP: A bar snack. MICROCHIP: What's left in the bag after you've eaten the chips. MODEM: What you did to the lawns. LAPTOP: Where the cat sleeps. SOFTWARE: Plastic knives & forks you get at Red Rooster. HARDWARE: Stainless steel knives & forks - from K-Mart. MOUSE: The small rodent that eats the grain in the shed. MAINFRAME: What holds the shed up. WEB: What spiders make. WEBSITE: Usually in the shed or under the verandah. SEARCH ENGINE: What you do when the Ute won't go. CURSOR: What you say when the Ute won't go. YAHOO: What you say when the Ute does go. UPGRADE: A steep hill. SERVER: The person at the pub who brings out the counter lunch.. MAIL SERVER: The bloke at the pub who brings out the counterlunch. USER: The neighbour who keeps borrowing things. NETWORK: What you do when you need to repair the fishing net. INTERNET: Where you want the fish to go. NETSCAPE: What the fish do when they discover the hole in the net. ONLINE: Where you hang the washing. OFFLINE: Where the washing ends up when the pegs aren't strong enough.

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Aussie Computer Terminology

How Lord of the Rings Should Have Ended

Laugh Master — Fri, 08 Oct 2010 12:30:18 +0000

How Lord of the Rings really should have ended… No, really. It makes a lot more sense like this and would have saved between 4-8 hours of your life.

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How Lord of the Rings Should Have Ended

English 50 Cent (50 Pence?)

Laugh Master — Thu, 09 Sep 2010 09:04:17 +0000

For all y’all who want to read the whit and whisdom of Fifty Cent (Fiddy to his friends ‘n homies) but suffer, like me, from a lack of understanding of how he talks - fret no more! You can now read 50 Cent’s twitter feed handily translated into the Queen’s English. Go check it out, y’all!* (* We would be delighted if you would gratefully consent to click on this modern link style contraption to read the fine written word styling of Master Fifty Cent Esq.), yo.

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English 50 Cent (50 Pence?)

Funniest Joke Ever (Well, of the 2010 Fringe)

Laugh Master — Mon, 23 Aug 2010 12:11:48 +0000

The winner of this year’s funniest joke< of the Fringe went to Tim Vine. His funniest joke, as adjudged by Dave, was a one-liner from his set as follows:

“I’ve just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I’ll tell you what, never again.”

Groan.

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Funniest Joke Ever (Well, of the 2010 Fringe)

The Best Bits of Caddyshack

Laugh Master — Tue, 15 Jun 2010 15:48:49 +0000

Love Caddyshack but can’t be bothered to watch through the whole
98 frikkin’ minutes? Then worry no more, as the Huffington Post folks have made your life a heckuva lot easier. Enjoy!

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The Best Bits of Caddyshack